


Clippings

by Kitschgeist



Category: Look Around You
Genre: Comedy, Fanart, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-28
Updated: 2015-07-27
Packaged: 2018-04-11 12:30:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 705
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4435574
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kitschgeist/pseuds/Kitschgeist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An interview with Jack Morgan (BSc) from short-lived magazine Quarterly Weekly, and a look at what the rest of the Look Around You presenters have been up to.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Quarterly Weekly (cover)

**Author's Note:**

> It's Look Around You Series 2 fanwork, made with a tiny fraction of the attention to detail that made the show so endearing! The ideas just wouldn't leave me.
> 
> Transcripts and a lot of notes are in the last chapter. Feel free to point out mistakes or anything (too) odd, I'm hardly an expert. Enjoy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Probably the only issue of Quarterly Weekly worth the paper it was printed on. (Found in the Stuart residence.)


	2. Quarterly Weekly (page 7)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Partario Stuart brings us an exclusive interview from when he bumped into Jack at Gatwick Airport.


	3. Petticoat VI and Michael-1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An advertisement for Petticoat Computers featuring Pealy Maghti, and a photo of Peter Packard meeting the first of his robot selves.

Fig 1: Pealy Maghti in a Petticoat Computers advertisement

 

Fig. 2: Peter Packard and Michael-1


	4. Transcripts and notes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Transcripts of the previous chapters, and the making-of.

**Chapter 1: Quarterly Weekly (cover)**

QUARTERLY weekly APR 1982 £⅝

Exclusive!  
The celebrity interview you didn't think we could do  
JACK MORGAN

WIN A STAY  
in our editor's spare room

Corporate birdwatching  
Fun for the whole department

We're hiring!  
Help make QW better! (Donations also welcome.)

PLUS!  
Amphibious fashion for beginners

* * *

**Chapter 2: Quarterly Weekly (page 7)**

**A chat with... Jack Morgan (BSc)**

Partario Stuart brings us an exclusive interview from when he bumped into Jack at Gatwick Airport

You may know Jack from his groundbreaking music, his chart-topping study “Effects of reggae on metabolism in middle-aged mice: a meta-analysis”, his work as a TV presenter on programmes including _Look Around You_ , or simply as one of Britain’s most famous Tarvuists. Now, Quarterly Weekly brings you the polymath pop star as you’ve never seen him before.

  
Quarterly Weekly: Were you really offered a role in _The Mousetrap: The Musical_?  
Jack Morgan: Sadly, no.

  
QW: Synthesizer Patel was an opening act on your last tour. Do you keep in touch with anyone else from _Look Around You_?  
JM: Pete, of course. But we’ve known each other since we were doing schools television. Pealy and Pam send me cards at Antmas, but not Antmas cards, because I don’t celebrate. I send them autographs in return. For them to give as Antmas gifts, you know. As I’ve said before, I haven’t spoken to Computer Jones since I reverted from my accidental sex change. He and Patricia                     are into “open systems”, but it just didn’t work out for us. Still, I wish them the best.

  
QW: What did you have for dinner?  
JM: Food. _[Ed. note: Jack is unable to disclose that he ate at O’Gravy’s because of confidential sponsorship talks with Imhotep Casseroles.]_

  
QW: What are your plans for the future?  
JM: I’m starting on a new album. It will have one or two Canterbury-style tracks, but most of it will be very experimental. I’m really looking forward to getting back in the lab.■

 

**Where are they now?: The _Look Around You_ presenters**

Pam Bachelor

Bachelor announced at a press conference last year that on the advice of her future self, she will be keeping a low profile. But eagle-eyed viewers may have spotted her as the Mystery Metalworker on _Children’s Metalwork_ (above).

Pealy Maghti

The spokeswoman for Petticoat Computers may not be Britain’s only professional gonnis player for long. In addition to her popular gonnis clinics for children and adults, classes for toddlers, teenagers, seniors, and ghosts are in the works.

Peter Packard

The _Blanket Bank_ host recently made the news as the first British man to sell his likeness to a robot manufacturer. He is to be the face of Sinister Robotics’ “Michael” line of talking androids, billed as future substitutes for humans in fields including broadcasting and therapy.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Petticoat VI and Michael-1**

Fig 1:

Bring out your Petticoat.

The modern woman is always on the go.  
That’s why she needs the new Petticoat VI. It’s a Petticoat made portable.  
The Petticoat VI fits in most large handbags, and can also be carried as a clutch. Weighing only one stone, it’s a breeze to bring it from home to work and back. And it comes with a water- and grease-proof casing for kitchen computing.  
Take it from Olympic gonnis player Pealy Maghti. She says: “My Petticoat VI is a great help for calculating trajectories. I never train without it.”  
The Petticoat VI also runs an expanded version of our ever-popular lipstick colour chart, which now supports eyeshadow.  
Ladies, don’t settle for personal computers – you deserve a HER-sonal computer.

Fig 2:

I, ROBOT: Packard (R) says "hello" to Michael-1 (L) at Sinister headquarters

had considered modelling the Michael line after a number of other public figures, most notably Tony Curtis, who declined.  
A Sinister spokesman said: “Our Michaels will demonstrate that androids are a viable alternative to clones, with the added benefits of being inorganic and having no personalities.  
“While we aim to engage our Michaels in various activities – from child-rearing to diplomacy – our current priority is television. We hope to help develop quality programming that would make Mr. Packard proud.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's all for now! Again, feel free to point out errors, or just comment.
> 
> **Stuff I made up:**
> 
> Quarterly Weekly - I don't know enough about British magazines from the era to have done a parody, so I cheated by inventing a terrible one. I could have used canon's Popular Men's Leisure Magazine, but I felt like they would have done a proper feature, and I didn't have the ability or confidence to pull that off.
> 
> "Effects of reggae on metabolism in middle-aged mice: a meta-analysis" - Speaks for itself.
> 
> The Mousetrap: The Musical - The Mousetrap, the play based on the Agatha Christie story. But with more singing.
> 
> Children's Metalwork - No particular inspiration. I chose a white welding mask because it reminded me of the Stig. No, I was never into Top Gear.
> 
> Blanket Bank - Based on Blankety Blank. Peter Serafinowicz played Terry Wogan in a [parody](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pNq7IZ-sTgI) of this for Comic Relief. Is it Blankety Blank with blankets? Is it more like Deal Or No Deal with blankets? I just don't know.
> 
> **Out-of-canon references:**
> 
> [Tarvuism](http://www.tarvu.com/wiki/doku.php?id=tarvuism) \- By Robert Popper and Peter Serafinowicz. I think it's plausible this also exists in the LAY universe, since the DVD extras had a programme called "Tarvunty" on the Ceefax TV listings. Was Jack Morgan (BSc) ever said to be a Tarvuist? That was just me.
> 
> Canterbury - IIRC, Jack's former band wasn't mentioned in either series. I only saw it on the [website](http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/lookaroundyou/series1/littlemouse.shtml).
> 
> Sinister and Michael robots - Both from The Peter Serafinowicz Show. Michael-6 is basically a robot Jeremy Kyle. Sinister ("A family company") is a company behind various strange products. They're not linked in the show.
> 
> **Image ingredients:**
> 
> QW cover:
> 
> Fonts - Bauhaus 93 (Made in 1993, but almost the same as Blippo Black, which was made in 1969. Shh.), Franklin Gothic  
> Images - Jack Morgan from the Little Mouse music video, [this](http://bashcorpo.deviantart.com/art/Grungy-paper-texture-v-5-22966998) texture
> 
> QW article:
> 
> Fonts - Cooper Black, Franklin Gothic, Bookman Old Style  
> Images - Jack Morgan from the Little Mouse music video, Pam Bachelor from [this](http://www.bbc.co.uk/comedy/lookaroundyou/people/pam.shtml) page on the LAY website, [this](http://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0386/2897/products/WeldingMask-110PWE.jpg?v=1394254925) mask, [these](http://www.netsafe.org.nz/wp-content/uploads/online-ideas-for-children.jpg) kids, [this](http://www.blundells.org/academic/cdt/images/facilties_workshop1.jpg) background
> 
> Petticoat advertisement:
> 
> Fonts - dafont.com's Apple Garamond, Bodoni MT (Acorn Computers' logo had Bodoni _something_.)  
>  Images - [Josie d'Arby](http://www.charityawards.co.uk/portfolio-type/josie-darby/), [Chris Evert](https://www.pinterest.com/maxfleming/chris-evert/), [this](http://cdn.shopify.com/s/files/1/0165/9816/products/traceylifestyle_7_1024x1024.jpg?v=1344891951) model, [this](http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/ODc3WDEwMDA=/z/x3AAAMXQ74JTUV3~/%24_35.JPG3) glove, [this](http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/MTU0M1gxNTQz/z/y1gAAOSwqu9VLlTh/%24_35.JPG) hat, [Petticoat-5](http://catboyfriend.tumblr.com/post/3738594419)  
> Logo - inspired by Acorn Computers ([Wikipedia](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Acorn_Computers)), based on [this](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:A_Gaenseblume4.JPG) picture of daisies. I realised it reminded me of an upside-down petticoat after I made it.
> 
> Peter and Michael-1:
> 
> Fonts - Times New Roman  
> Images - Peter Packard from LAY, Michael-6 from The Peter Serafinowicz Show, a fragment of Peter Packard's hair, [Terry Wogan](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/7b/e5/91/7be59124ed6273ecca75a25f34f9c75b.jpg), [this](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d8/Abandoned_bus_outside_the_Gerresheimer_Glass_Factory_\(October_3,_2011\).jpg) background, [this](http://bashcorpo.deviantart.com/art/Grungy-paper-texture-v-20-471308560) texture
> 
> Still reading?
> 
> Thanks, reader.
> 
> Theader.


End file.
